So I spent my entire lunch at the mall today.
I was supposed to be looking for candles and ended up lost in rows of makeup, lingerie and snazzy peacoats.
Why do I torture myself?
How come you always see a million things you want when you're window shopping, but when you go shopping with your pockets loaded, nothing appeals to you??
I can hardly remember the last time I TRULY splurged on myself..
OK, so maybe it was last Christmas... [lol]- But I don't really consider that splurging as much as just catching up. I bought things that I NEEDED and had put off as opposed to buying frivolous things simply because I wanted them.
It seems like the kids always need something, there's always something we need for the house, unexpected costs come up and then extra money sometimes doesn't get spent as wisely as we plan, i.e. Bulk Junk Food purchases at Costco and my extensive Juicy Couture SOCK collection which has YET to be rivaled (don't ask!).
I feel like somehow in the midst of it all, I lost myself.
The selfishness of a life prior to children has disappeared to be replaced by the Martyr who takes pride in knowing she does for everyone in her family but herself.
Now when I'm at a point in my life where I've met the most accomplishment thus far and should be the most self-satisfied, I feel as if I lack the confidence I deserve because I'm not doing myself justice.
THE CLASSIC STORY
Beautiful young women.
who mature into busy young mothers.
who begin to live for others.
and give up on taking care of themselves...
Is this the reason women my age hit a quarter life crisis?
mood today: indescribable
